Stop & Go Faith

Things I learned on my way to Lewisville – Day 1

Stop & Go Faith

Hebrews 12:1&2 Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God.

2 Tim. 4:7 I have fought the good fight, I have finished the course, I have kept the faith;

Phil 3:10-15 I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, and so, somehow, to attain to the resurrection from the dead. Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining towards what is ahead, I press on towards the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenwards in Christ Jesus. All of us who are mature should take such a view of things. And if on some point you think differently, that too God will make clear to you.
The last two weeks of March was end of quarter for our customer and I was required to be in the Lewisville TX warehouse.  The drive from my house is about an hour and I must admit, I was grumbling and not looking forward to that drive.  I told myself and the Lord every reason why this was ridiculous and unproductive but I was required to do it so I did.  As it turned out, the Lord had something in mind when He set this whole thing up and as He usually does, He taught as I drove.
Day one was crazy.  It was a Monday and anyone one who knows me well knows Mondays are NOT my favorite day.  This is partly because I try to pile a weeks worth of chores & activities into my weekend so I am usually exhausted when Monday roles around. 
So off I go and as I pulled out and noticed the amount of traffic I was going to have to deal with I grumbled.  I was reminding the Lord that I could already be on my computer being productive but no, here I was in this rush hour traffic.  I would get started going good then all of a sudden brake lights would light up the road and we would start slowing down.  Just as we were almost at a stop, the traffic started moving again and I hit the gas only to have to hit the breaks again.  Stop and go, stop and go, stop and go.  Suddenly as I sat there waiting for the traffic to move again I heard the voice of the Holy Spirit saying, “Stop and Go, Stop and Go.  This traffic is allot like your faith walk.”  I took a deep breath then exhaled whispering, “I should have known You had a lesson for me today”.  I was reminded that my walk with the Lord was exactly like this traffic.  Going along fine, seemingly walking in His will then all of a sudden something happens and I’m moving at a snail’s pace or not moving at all.  On fire one day and cold as ice the next.  Depending on Him as my life’s source one day and trying to do it on my own the next; living in victory one day and back in shackles the next. 
As I thought about what the Lord was showing me I realized how true it was and began to ask why; why was that the story of my faith walk?  Why was I not consistently running the race with endurance; pressing toward the goal, fighting the good fight?  Was it a lack of trust, love, dependency, belief?  “Partly all of these,” He replied, “You are not seeking Him first in all you do. Your faith walk is a picture of your lack of seeking Him and putting Him first.  You get so caught up in the daily demands and doing your will that you often allow Him to be crowed out.  He becomes a back seat passenger instead of the GPS system that guides and directs every turn.  You do not live as if you are desperate for His guidance and dependent on His presence; you live as if you can take it or leave it.  You want Him there but at a “close distance” in case you need Him but you do not want Him to come in and take over every thing that makes up your life; your being; your very next breath.”
I tried to take it all in and realized every word was true.  I take the Lord for granted and I expect Him to do His part whether or not I do mine.  I want the benefits of His blessing, protection, guidance but without having to seek Him for it.  I want to know Him and have a relationship with Him but don’t take the time required to develop that type of closeness and intimacy.  If I am to be transformed by the renewing of my mind, if hiding His word in my heart is what keeps me from “stop and go” faith then I MUST make that my priority.  I can not let days go by without as much as a glance in His word.  I must hunger and thirst for Him and His truth.  I must put Him in His rightful place as the very center of my being; seated on the throne of my life.  He must be the ultimate “love of my life” and I must not forget what He has done for me.  He loved me, bought me & sought me before I ever knew He existed.  He has been the one person in my life that has loved me like I dreamt of being loved and He desires that I love him back; that I seek Him first and that I have no other gods before Him.
Once again I realized how much like the children of Israel I am.  An entire generation of them lived with stop and go faith and they died without ever receiving what He had prepared and promised them.  I do not want that to be the legacy I leave my children and grandchildren.  I want to have a faith that presses on, runs the race and fights the good fight.  I want to know that I have been faithful and not ashamed.  I want to get on the gas and live out the rest of my life as if there were no brakes when it comes to following Christ; no stopping, no looking back, no regrets….full throttle ahead.
Father,
Thank you for loving me and using everyday life to teach me the lessons you have for me to learn.  Thank you for not condemning me but making me aware of the areas in my life that do not please you.  Thank you most of all for wanting intimacy with me and for seeking me on the days that I have not thought to seek you.  Father, please give me the strength and the desire to make the changes that need to be made.  Make me willing to obey you and love you like you so deserve to be loved.
In Jesus name, Amen.